New York City: the land of bright lights, big dreams and beautiful views (for the most part). Yes, as much as we enjoy your convenience, dollar slices, and dope nightlife, we’re kind of done being pushed around by you. You’re constantly reminding us that our good isn’t good enough and our best is B-A-S-I-C. But I’ve got news for you; you’re not as hot as you think you are. Well, now I need to take a step back. Because in all actuality, many of the reasons I love New York are the same reasons why other people might hate it. But hey, I’m a native so it’s time to start acting like one. You can’t just call yourself a New Yorker and then talk sh*t about it right? So for now I will zip the lip and let you decide if the following 3 things make you hate to love or love to hate the concrete jungle we call home.
1. The subway
I’m not sure what’s worse, the actual subway or it’s riders. I could certainly do without the vast clouds of B.O. during rush-hour jams, the sick passengers breathing down my neck, the track work delays, the subway cars with no A/C, the slimy subway poles, the passengers that whack me with their backpacks full of bricks, and the occasional whiff of week old piss and dirty humans.
With that being said, there are still parts of me that love the subway. Until I’m rich enough to afford my own chauffer to schlep me all over god’s creation, the subway is the most valuable $2.75 investment at this point in my life.
2. NYC Tourists
Ok so if you live in New York and haven’t complained about something a tourist has done at least once, you must be one patient mo fo and I would love for you to show me your ways. Until then I’m going to continue on with my rant.
New Yorkers tend to beat to the same drum, a very very fast drum to be exact. Even if we aren’t in a rush we act like we are because we want to get to where we want to go while avoiding as many people as possible. But tourists on the other hand, beat to their own very obnoxious and irritating drum in that they could care less how it sounds or affects other people. There’s a reason why New Yorkers avoid places like Times Square at all costs unless some life-changing necessity requires us to go there kicking and screaming. It’s like trying to push your way through a heard of grazing cattle.
For example, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a rush and all of the sudden a group of people stop short right in front of me and I barrel into them from behind. Lo and behold, they are tourists picking up that damn camera around their neck to take some irrelevant picture that’s probably out of focus. But by all means, stop in the middle of the sidewalk and leave no room for the crowds of people to get around you so you can capture that perfect picture of those NYC trashcans in the distance.
3. The Prices
Even for someone like me, who is a super saver when it comes to money, it’s far too easy to fall victim to overspending in the city. Whether it’s the bartender telling you the bar has a $30 minimum on credit cards or demolishing your checking account even further with overpriced taxi rides, it’s something you get used to quite quickly. You’ll have out-of-towners come visit that are used to $2 shots and laundry prices being included in their rent. NEWS FLASH: living the dream comes with a price, which usually means a high level of anxiety and a tapped out bank account. Cheers!
Ok, so obviously the expensive part is sort of a drag, but some of the expensive places are worth saving up for, especially when it comes to food. Just think, the extra $10 you’re spending on that burger & fries may result in an Instagram worthy picture with 100+ likes – GO YOU.
Overall, the funny part about NYC is how incredible yet absolutely horrible it can be at the same time. It’s like a cat that is nice to you one minute and will scratch the sh*t out of you the next. This city can eat you up and spit you out if you let it, but it will push you to bounds you never expected to reach. Loving New York is a cliché, but it’s a cliché for a reason.
Welcome to the life of the Broke & Bothered, Xo.