5 Toursity Things Every New Yorker Needs to Do At Least Once

Walking in Times Square has its own unique form of misery, but there are countless reasons why the Big Apple is such a popular travel destination in the first place. And by ignoring things that we consider “only for tourists,” we could be selling ourselves and our city short. This is why I gathered a quick list of things us NYers need to cross off our bucket list because hey, there’s a first time for everything and you really have no excuse, so shut up and listen.

  1. Have brunch with Lady Liberty

Even though she’s right in our background, many New Yorkers are guilty of never visiting the Statue of Liberty. Can you really even call yourself a New Yorker if you haven’t made your rounds on Ellis Island once or twice?

Seriously, you need to take a selfie with her. Like yesterday. The best city in the world has history and ya’ll need to familiarize yourselves before saying you’re a “proud New Yorker.”

2.  Take in a Broadway show

Going to see a Broadway show isn’t in the budget? Totally understandable. But, if you’re one of the fortunate ones that have money coming out your you know what, what’s your real excuse for not going? I mean, you can always mail the tickets to me, or donate to my GoFundMe page…But anyway, Broadway shows are world-renowned for a reason, and once they take your breath away, you’ll know why too.

3. Eat your heart out in Little Italy

Chicken parm, spaghetti, cannoli’s, CARBS. Take home a piece of Little Italy with treats from the old-school Di Palo’s Fine Foods and Parisi Bakery because not everyone in the city expects you to be supermodel skinny. That’s why we all wear black #duh.

4. Sing the Rangers’ goal song with 18,200 of your closest friends at MSG

There’s nothing like a Rangers Game at MSG and if you have some time, walk the halls to view the historical photos of celebs and events that have graced the Garden throughout the years. And if you’re not into sports, there are concerts like every other night. Literally. So get on that.

5. Slow the f*ck down & take a tour of Grand Central Station

Giphy

If you’re anything like me, you’re ALWAYS in a rush, even when you’re not. So when I see people stopped in the middle of Grand Central staring at the ceiling, I just want to barrel into them with my suitcase and tell them to get out of my way. But instead of being a coldhearted b*tch, maybe I should see what they are looking at for a change. I mean it is over 100 years old and now houses five restaurants and cocktail lounges, a Dining Concourse, and 50 shops. Cool? Or nah.

Of course there are hundreds of other things to do in NYC, but this list is just a quick inspiration to start your journey around the greatest and dirtiest city in the world. Stay safe out there peeps & happy exploring.

Xo, Broke & Bothered.

 

 

 

Top 3 Reasons We Love to Hate NYC

New York City: the land of bright lights, big dreams and beautiful views (for the most part). Yes, as much as we enjoy your convenience, dollar slices, and dope nightlife, we’re kind of done being pushed around by you. You’re constantly reminding us that our good isn’t good enough and our best is B-A-S-I-C. But I’ve got news for you; you’re not as hot as you think you are. Well, now I need to take a step back. Because in all actuality, many of the reasons I love New York are the same reasons why other people might hate it. But hey, I’m a native so it’s time to start acting like one. You can’t just call yourself a New Yorker and then talk sh*t about it right? So for now I will zip the lip and let you decide if the following 3 things make you hate to love or love to hate the concrete jungle we call home.

1. The subway

200 (5)

I’m not sure what’s worse, the actual subway or it’s riders. I could certainly do without the vast clouds of B.O. during rush-hour jams, the sick passengers breathing down my neck, the track work delays, the subway cars with no A/C, the slimy subway poles, the passengers that whack me with their backpacks full of bricks, and the occasional whiff of week old piss and dirty humans.

With that being said, there are still parts of me that love the subway. Until I’m rich enough to afford my own chauffer to schlep me all over god’s creation, the subway is the most valuable $2.75 investment at this point in my life.

2. NYC Tourists

clinicallysane88.tumblr.com

Ok so if you live in New York and haven’t complained about something a tourist has done at least once, you must be one patient mo fo and I would love for you to show me your ways. Until then I’m going to continue on with my rant.

New Yorkers tend to beat to the same drum, a very very fast drum to be exact. Even if we aren’t in a rush we act like we are because we want to get to where we want to go while avoiding as many people as possible. But tourists on the other hand, beat to their own very obnoxious and irritating drum in that they could care less how it sounds or affects other people. There’s a reason why New Yorkers avoid places like Times Square at all costs unless some life-changing necessity requires us to go there kicking and screaming. It’s like trying to push your way through a heard of grazing cattle.

tumblr_inline_neqmqz9lUB1ro2d43tumblr_inline_neqmro43541ro2d43

For example, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a rush and all of the sudden a group of people stop short right in front of me and I barrel into them from behind. Lo and behold, they are tourists picking up that damn camera around their neck to take some irrelevant picture that’s probably out of focus. But by all means, stop in the middle of the sidewalk and leave no room for the crowds of people to get around you so you can capture that perfect picture of those NYC trashcans in the distance.

3. The Prices

bridesmaids-gif

Even for someone like me, who is a super saver when it comes to money, it’s far too easy to fall victim to overspending in the city. Whether it’s the bartender telling you the bar has a $30 minimum on credit cards or demolishing your checking account even further with overpriced taxi rides, it’s something you get used to quite quickly. You’ll have out-of-towners come visit that are used to $2 shots and laundry prices being included in their rent. NEWS FLASH: living the dream comes with a price, which usually means a high level of anxiety and a tapped out bank account. Cheers!

tumblr_my8pajZh5y1sz0jwfo1_500

Ok, so obviously the expensive part is sort of a drag, but some of the expensive places are worth saving up for, especially when it comes to food. Just think, the extra $10 you’re spending on that burger & fries may result in an Instagram worthy picture with 100+ likes – GO YOU.

Overall, the funny part about NYC is how incredible yet absolutely horrible it can be at the same time. It’s like a cat that is nice to you one minute and will scratch the sh*t out of you the next. This city can eat you up and spit you out if you let it, but it will push you to bounds you never expected to reach. Loving New York is a cliché, but it’s a cliché for a reason.

Welcome to the life of the Broke & Bothered, Xo.

MidtownSunset_460_1